Wonderland
by TheLostMaximoff
Summary: There's a part of Thea's brain that knows staying in the Dominators' fantasy world is wrong. She just needs to hear it from someone she trusts even more than her brother.


Wonderland

By TheLostMaximoff

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters. This is my shameless attempt to get Roy into the crossover/100th episode. I miss him and I miss this pairing. R/R.

Thea watches her brother walk out of her life, or her not-life in this case. She doesn't understand his decision but that's nothing new. Maybe she's just trying to convince herself that this doesn't hurt. Maybe she just needs to get used to the new normal. She chokes down the thoughts of leaving with him. Her life is perfect here. There's no city-destroying catastrophe that needs stopping. There are no villains trying to murder the people she loves. There's just her family, Laurel, and her entire perfect life ahead of her. She has a purpose here, something more mundane than the real world but she likes that. She's never wanted the life that Oliver leads, not deep down in her heart. This is all she's ever wanted.

Thea looks around her family's mansion, the only home that she's ever known. She remembers so many times when she was a little girl playing pretend. She would be the beautiful princess and the mansion would be her castle. Everything seemed better back then. Everything in this fantasy seems better now. Maybe her life has come full circle and she has a chance here. Someone will have to console Laurel when Oliver and Sara leave. Someone will have to explain things to their parents. How can she explain though? How can she just tell her parents that none of this is real? She thinks about the answers to those questions for a moment and then makes a decision. Ignorance is bliss. It's time to believe the lie. It's time to get her happy ending after suffering through so much pain. It's time to be the beautiful princess living in her castle.

"Can I get you another drink, Ms. Queen?"

Thea hears his voice and shivers slightly. She turns and sees a waiter with his tray of drinks carefully balanced on his palm. She should have known that her fantasy would involve him somehow. She expects the flood of incorrect memories to overtake her, the Dominators' illusions twisting her thoughts into compliance. There's nothing in her head right now but the truth. She's waited forever to see Roy again. The only thing she's ever truly wanted was to be with him until the end of time. After all, what's a beautiful princess without a brave and handsome prince? She thinks that this is it, the reward to reinforce the idea that she made the right decision.

"Roy." She hugs him tightly and somehow the tray of drinks in his hand magically disappears. "I knew you'd be here."

Roy encircles her with his arms, kissing her on the top of her head and holding her. She thinks that this feels so incredibly right. No more dying, no more bloodlust, no more anything. It's just going to be her and Roy together forever. She can't wait to start her perfect life with him.

"You know I'm not real, right?"

"I don't care. I already told my brother that I'm not leaving."

"Thea, I'm not part of this fantasy at all." Roy cups her chin and leads her gaze up to meet his. "I'm part of your head."

"Roy, I know the Dominators are screwing with my head and I don't care. Things are so much better here. Laurel's here, my parents are here, and you're here. Why would I want to leave that?"

"You do want to leave, Thea. That's the reason I'm here. I told you before that I'm not part of the Dominators. I'm part of you."

Thea almost pushes him away except that she can't. She looks into his eyes and realizes something. She remembers deciding that she wouldn't let anyone control her. Merlyn tried to turn her into a weapon he could use against her brother. She thought that he was making her better, stronger. Maybe in a way, he did. Now here she is, letting another entity control her through lies and manipulation. The lie is so tempting though because at its heart is a sad truth. Thea misses everyone. That longing to go back to a simpler time in her life is what's keeping her trapped here. Her brain knows this and decided to fight back the only way it could.

"Roy, please," she begs him but she's really begging herself. "I just want my old life back. Don't try to tell me that it's not worth it. Don't tell me that it's wrong when you know that you would do the same."

"I'm not really Roy, Thea," he reminds her. "C'mon, who else in your life besides your brother would you trust unconditionally? Your brain knows that this is wrong, Thea. You know you can't really be happy in here while your brother and your friends are out there fighting for their lives."

Thea finally tears her gaze from his and looks at the throng of happy, plastic people. She's always wanted an escape from the pain of her life. It started when Oliver and her father went down with The Queen's Gambit and she became a drug addict. She's always looking for some way to numb the pain and now she's found it. What has she really found though? A lie in an attractive package? She's lied to herself so many times about so many things. She's living clean now, sober from everything that she's been through. She's taking control of her own life.

"They just look so happy," she murmurs and Roy puts a hand on her shoulder. "I guess it's true what they say. You just can't go home again."

"Home's wherever and whatever you make it, Thea."

"And who you make it with," says Thea as she looks back at Roy. "Do I click my heels or something?"

"Just go with your brother and be a hero again."

"Goodbye, Roy." She kisses him one last time and tries to memorize the taste of his lips on hers.

Roy disappears when she breaks off the kiss but she still feels his presence somewhere in her head. Thea turns and silently says goodbye to her parents as she watches them talk business with other business people across the room. She moves her eyes to Laurel, smiling and laughing with one of her friends. Laurel, the girl who could have been her sister-in-law but was always her sister anyway. She wonders what Laurel would have chosen if she had been plugged into this hellish version of The Matrix. Thea already knows the answer to that question. Laurel was the person who taught her that nothing worth having comes easy. She was the one who really taught Thea how to fight. No matter what the circumstances, Thea refuses to dishonor that strength. She braces herself and walks towards the front door as fast as she can, intent on catching up with Oliver and the others. Wonderland is a nice place to visit but she's not planning on living there anytime soon.


End file.
